


Dreams & Screams

by Nonbinari_Goat



Category: Self Aware (Webcomic)
Genre: Crack, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, bcose of the. Quality, for his son!!, roberts is dealing w hos emo phase, tbh this was only meant for wattpad, theres a lil bit of plot, very hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:48:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25987684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonbinari_Goat/pseuds/Nonbinari_Goat
Summary: Mell has a weird dream.
Relationships: Mell Carter/Jordan Kai Mallory
Comments: 30
Kudos: 8





	Dreams & Screams

**Author's Note:**

> posted here for sa council (only tbh, no one reads this stuff lmao)) 🧡 hi kipp, flam, lexi, have a fun ride!! dont trip like ell~
> 
> ((cross posted on Wattpad))
> 
> [Subject 402](https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/subject-402/list?title_no=426462) and [Self Aware](https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/self-aware/list?title_no=330088) belong to @Jellofello 👁👁🧡🧡🧡

“JORBAN” melk yelle at a verrrrrryyyy hi pitch. “JORB JORB FUCK THE MALLORYS WHERE R U?”

unbenounced by meld carper, jorb morb was having a serious convesation about consent to a cactus.

“sh” he wailed “theyre sleepinh”

“who?????????.?”

jorb jorb walks supper duper luper cooper snooper de nooper close to his face from the corner he was in. “leo.”

“the misk lnake???”

“ya”

“aspeniss?? misk lanke?.?:??”

“heah”

“but why”

“.”

“ksi. kai bls”

jord was tofar now. he spiinnin around like a ballerina with leo and made him Xtra gold becose uh. magick. his heart powers were goin lik mad games bro.

meld was very jello. not that he WAS jello— wait

“am i made of jelo”

“mell what the fuck”

cough

“shit the fuck up you limp ass wormof an author im da n c i ng”

HEY. DONT BE FUCKING RUDE.

“IDC BITCH” and thus the author stfu

ellion suddenly burstted in the room like a camel on liquid weed, scaring the cactus

“elliot you fuck” jorb cried for he losted his friend

“BACK” he pants “AWAY” wowie his knees are shakin like maracas. and he tripped. bitch bls tie your fucking shoes u dumb child

jorb laughed at his pain

“hold on” he says, turning to jorb. “im gonna punt you into the fucking sun”

“ellie no” meld shouts, sobbing

“yea ellie” jorb agrees solemnl.y “youll get hurt by my dummy thicc tentecales

elite held his breathes in ant angerq. suddenly— 

crows

wait no////

ORBERTS. busteded the door down wit his wife in hand like a tiger. he has blue eyeshadow and a manly mohawk the legth of assrons ego. whick was grey-blue bcose he supports his sons dyed not dyed hair. “ELLIOT RAINOR” HE YELls “YOURE UNDER ARREsT FOR SWEARING” an d pulls out a bazukaa

“oh shit” jam saids from the ccceeiling

“ _YOULL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVEEEEE_ ” elk screechs lik hes on helllilum and? is sudeenly headless??? wtf

meld sobs in the the corber which is weird coz ?? he dont cry?? tf??? but he is. “i hat this fucking family”

jamie is here fore sum reabson now.werent you on the ceiling u fuck. 

“pat pat” he says like a dizzy califorinian person, becausehes from cali now ig. 

the surroundibgs was now palm trees and coconuts and honestly this is alreaby so wack that meld dont even questuon it. “make it stopppppppwpppp”

“ok” jam sayd

“what?”

“what?”

“whill you two shut the FUCJ UP IM HAVING A _MOMENT_ ” KAI SAys suddenly like an mad banana. hes holding an ocopussy dearly lik itz his last bit of zanity

“ok” jam says. ans then he fuckinh hits meld in the face like wtf jam thats hurts people

while meld is gettinh hit in the head with a hammer lik some shitty 90z carton, kai is signing adoption papers. :0 

ksi looks at his new child kovingly befor hitting jam in the facce wit a. a spoon. so many ouchies...

idk where ell and orberts are but i thinj theyre outside beating down in yhe parkin loot. lilly and asp are there?? ell ks winning somehoe, headless he may be.

idk where the fuck his wife went, andraw robbed her ig

“go dad” kai says. before relaizing and turning in2 a tomatoe.

“get fucked detectibe jorb” wwwwhf wow ell said fuck jorb lives. uh, he loses 1 xp for disrespecctin todos dilf

”awe man :(” jam saids in saddenness. he starts strumming a G string bcose hes a fuckingh EMO which truns kai bacc ti normal. mostly

his face is sill red and his hair is now leafy. wotever, back to orberts,

s

“WHEN I WAS” he screams

“A YOUNG BOY” jam says bacK “MY FATHER—“

“SOLD ME TO HIS COOPERATION,”

“what” orberts askeds confusedly in dad rage

“ _TO BE A LAB RAT, AND WORK WITH NO DENTAL_ ,”

jam cries. hes right, none of them bitches got dental. #FuckAssronMallory2020ButNotLikeThatWY(StaresAtLexi,)

oh anyways, speaking of battles(

ROBETRS IS WINNING????? wack. ell is biting his ankle likes ants dio and only 1 ingury is there!!!!! !!! !!!!!!!! !

lily is havin the tome of her lil life and asp is rappin somethin mean. we all knows he be like that,

leo!!! is groovin. shake it off u spunky snake. kai is winnin the lottto 9f gay apoearently and orberts is. somewhere. ell is panting again.

oh theres orberts. hes huggin jorb. aweee

“where the FUCK,” elloot yells while kai sighscontentedly in dad hugs. “IS MELD.”

meld, currently held hostage, is sobbing in unconciousness.

“Mell,” he hears. He hates it here.

“MELL,” ouch thats kinda loud bro—

“Mell please get up I can’t Breathe,” aaa???

“Elliot??” he questions tiredly, opening his eyes before shutting them due to the bright light from his window. Stupid sunlight.

“The one and only!” the red head pops. “You good? You looked like you were havin’ a nightmare again or somethin’.” 

“Uh— yeah,” he runs a hand in his hair. “I had the wackest dream.”

“Mmm. It be like that. C’mon, cenn made breakfast and Kai’s the only one down there right now.” 

“WHAT???” 

“YEAH!”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU STAY DOWN THERE??” 

“BECAUSE THEY TOLD ME TO GET YOU!” 

“ _WELL I’M UP NOW,”_

“THEN LETS GOOOOOO—“

“ **_OK YOU DONT HAVE TO SHOUT AT ME”_ **

The pair stumble down the stairs like their lives depended on it. Or, to be specific, Mx. Rainors life depended on it. Mrs. Rainor was still asleep, probably.

They tripped, they fell, Ellie was somehow breaking Mells’ back more than he should and not being very productive! Sitting on the floor, groaning and all.

They come to the kitchen and _bazoinks_ if Mell wasn’t gay before he is NOW.

Kai was sitting on the couch, long blue hair up in a messy do with strands fallen on his face. His fuck eye blue eyes reflected off Mx. Rainors speech bubbles with soft white, and his long fingers fiddled with the tiny braid he started. The hue of the suns’ rays hit his skin in the prettiest of angles, lips barely moving as he replied to them. The grey T-shirt he borrowed from the yellow eyed boy in question was a bit big on him, showing a bit of his collar bone. His lanky legs faced inward as he sat, his feet covered by blue socks with vials of green liquid. Posture awkward, something you wouldn’t notice unless you’ve known him long enough, he looked like he didn’t want to be there.

“wow thats a lot of simping toe”

“aaa??.”

“Dw ellie” he pats his hair. “the readers will get it”

uh so they get there, eat bekkfast, n mell kisses the fuck out of kai after the rainors go shopping for stuff idk. propaganda happens. jam is somewhere. what, did you think ghis would be serious? and have an actual end?? guess again bitch!

they play ddr for 3 hours but unlike jam they actually play it RIGHG (with music and a comtrolet. fuckin eboy) and kai plays TBP on loop for a bit. kiss kiss fall in love.

meld suddenly turns into a gold ingot. kai mourns. “Y is lyfe so crueal” he sobs before turinging into a lepiz lazuli pieve. 

the End.

**Author's Note:**

> THE ASPENIS JOKE WAS FOR REDACTED HI SIS ILU 😶 hed be disappointed in us for thsi joke but by GOD did i laugh when writing it wdjsidicodf


End file.
